Feeling much more positive!
Last weekend was probably one of the hardest of my life emotionally. I 'rested' monday and tuesday, went back to work wednesday but was sick all night and ended up resting on thursday too! I worked again on Friday and didn't suffer too much for it!
When I had my bleed, my boss cancelled my Saturday shift so I begged James to take the weekend off and spend time with me for the first time in a few months. (My darling boyfriend works 6 days a week, ten hour days so I can work part time and rest) so thats what he did :)
Friday night, we got dinner from the chip shop and went down to the sea walls and sat watching the boats in the solent, then we went over to my parents new penthouse and met my younger brothers new girlfriend and had a drink on the balcony overlooking even more of the solent and the isle of wight ( I had elderflower presse that looked like wine in a wine glass... placebo effect :P ) which was lovely but after a day on my feet I needed my bed so we went home to chill out with Fishcake, the worlds strangest kitten.
Saturday we hopped on the ferry and then the fastcat and spent the day in Ryde on the Isle of Wight, we walked along the seafront, had lunch in a lovely mexican restaurant, did a spot of baby shopping and bought these:
When I had my bleed, my boss cancelled my Saturday shift so I begged James to take the weekend off and spend time with me for the first time in a few months. (My darling boyfriend works 6 days a week, ten hour days so I can work part time and rest) so thats what he did :)
Friday night, we got dinner from the chip shop and went down to the sea walls and sat watching the boats in the solent, then we went over to my parents new penthouse and met my younger brothers new girlfriend and had a drink on the balcony overlooking even more of the solent and the isle of wight ( I had elderflower presse that looked like wine in a wine glass... placebo effect :P ) which was lovely but after a day on my feet I needed my bed so we went home to chill out with Fishcake, the worlds strangest kitten.
Saturday we hopped on the ferry and then the fastcat and spent the day in Ryde on the Isle of Wight, we walked along the seafront, had lunch in a lovely mexican restaurant, did a spot of baby shopping and bought these:
Then we had an icecream and hopped back on the fastcat, we popped to mums for more drinks on the balcony then went for a lovely meal with my parents and my brothers new girlfriend.
Sunday, we sailed over to priory bay and had a bbq on the beach, had a swim and sunbathed then came home and had pizza.
All in all, a perfect weekend. I don't say it enough, but James is the reason I keep going when I feel crappy, he is so supportive, kind and wonderful, it helps that hes gorgeous too. I feel so lucky to be having a baby with my best friend. Looking forward to being a parent with the best partner in crime ever. I know I can count on him for anything and everything and that he works himself into the ground to make sure we have everything we need. Love you Jimmy Jams :)
Poorly lady
I've been ill now for a week :( no fun in this heat!! Whats really cheered me up is joining the "due in October 2012" group on facebook because we're all in the same boat and I feel less alone! Its lovely finding out who's having what and talking NON STOP about babies :D
Me and James are hopefully going to the Isle of Wight for a mini break this weekend, really think we need it as we haven't really spent much time together due to him working all the time.
Me and James are hopefully going to the Isle of Wight for a mini break this weekend, really think we need it as we haven't really spent much time together due to him working all the time.
How I've lost a stone whilst pregnant
No I didn't cut off an arm. I started slimming world online when I was 5 weeks gone and lost 8lbs in about 2 weeks then found out at 7 weeks and started to feel pants so only ate a little bit just enough to look after baby. Then I had sickness for two weeks and now I try to eat healthily and get all the vitamins I need but must admit I eat out and have had a few takeaways recently but still not gaining! Will start back on a pregnancy friendly version of slimming world to maintain my weight and eat as healthily as I can as soon as I'm done resting! That's my secret lol!
Bed rest is for lazies
So, I had a second bleed and went to the out of hours doctor, she heard baby's heart and it's nice and strong and examined me. She think I'll be fine if I rest for a while. I've done some research and think i have a sensitive cervix or a low lying placenta, if it's the latter I'll be put on bed rest at my 20 week scan which won't be great as we'll struggle on one income.
Very tired today, pregnancy is one hell of an emotional roller coaster.
Very tired today, pregnancy is one hell of an emotional roller coaster.
The worst night of my life
Last night was the worst night of my life. I woke up as usual at 3am for a wee and found I had been bleeding. Trying not to become hysterical, I rang NHS direct who put me on a wait list to speak to the out of hours doctor... longest 45 mins of my life!! I kept myself calm by listening to her heart with my doppler. He told me to come and see him at 4.45 so I woke James up and my parents and they drove me there whilst I tried not to cry too much. The doctor was a lovely guy but his first doppler didn't work, which gave me a heart attack but with the next one he heard her heartbeart which was beautiful as ever. He then rang the on call 'gyno' who told me to rest up and let my midwife know.
I know theres a few reasons for bleeds, I had a slight bleed of old blood at 15 weeks, but it honestly is the most gut wrenching and terrifying thing I've ever experienced. The thought of losing my baby is enough to ruin me.
Anyways, we will wait and see..
I know theres a few reasons for bleeds, I had a slight bleed of old blood at 15 weeks, but it honestly is the most gut wrenching and terrifying thing I've ever experienced. The thought of losing my baby is enough to ruin me.
Anyways, we will wait and see..
This is gorgeous
I hate the following
- Winny the pooh
- Hot Pink
- 'I love my bear' soppy type things
- cartoons
The friend problem
Ive known about my pregnancy for 10 weeks now and the worst thing about it I've found is friends. They drop like flies. You don't get invited anywhere, you don't hear from them and you become really quite dull. One friend in particular who I was very close to me hasn't spoken to me since I told her!
I've found that some of my friends who don't invite me out simply don't think I'll want to go out as I suffered from sickness for a few weeks and wasn't very social but the easiest way to solve that was by telling them that I am very available and very bored!!
I feel okay about being dumped by some friends as its a really good way to judge who was actually your friend and who just wanted a drinking partner! Oh and being deleted by male friends on Facebook who were always just friends kind of makes me think that now I'm pregnant I'm not worth being friends with as access to my pants isn't very likely ha!
The plus side is that my closest friends have been wonderful at giving me support when I need it and space when I'm tired and emotional! Also, I've reconnected with so many people who are genuinely excited for our babys arrival which is so sweet :) and I've become closer to a lot of friends who are parents themselves and I have learnt to bloody well respect them! So far I've not met up with anyone it's all been mainly Facebook based but I hope that I will have a whole new group of friends to enjoy as well as the ones that have been such stars!
Patience is a virtue
As you can tell by my inability to wait for my 20 week scan to find out we were having a girl! I love saying I'm havif a girl, I've always always wanted a daughter :) today I'm feeling frustrated as I hate waiting to go shopping ( I'm naughty and already have a swimsuit, some shoes and two sleep suits) and hate looking fat rather than obviously pregnant! And I hate not being able to feel her yet! Patience is a bloody virtue and I have none!!!
In less grumbly news, I've started to clear out the nursery but it's unfortunately full of my mums stuff for her new house. I've found a company that does anti bacterial all natural paint in really cute colours that's safe for me to use whilst pregnant so im going to start doing all that probably the end of next month! I've got my eye on this absolutely beautiful giant wall sticker of a tree at the moment and a smaller one for above the cot that says always kiss me goodnight. So soppy but so cute! Cots is another issue, I know I want a white one and I know it has a be a cotbed but can I choose one that isn't a ridiculous price?! Hellll no!
She's a girl!!!
So, at 16 weeks, I couldn't wait any longer and had a private scan! James and I went, I was completely convinced we were having a boy. But no, shes a girl :) which makes one boy and one girl due this year in our family. Couldn't be more perfect!! So ever since I've been looking at little dresses and shoes and have fallen head over heels for a lilac pram
Isn't it BEAUTIFUL! It's been discontinued so my quest to find it continues!
I'm going to be an Aunty!!
So, I haven't mentioned... my stepbrother and his girlfriend Faye are also having a baby!! He's due six weeks before my baby.. yes, I'm having a nephew!! When we found out, mum and I went moderately wild in the Next baby boy section! I can't wait to be an aunty, having two babies to cuddle at Christmas will be so lovely :)
All goes a bit down hill.. Then up again!
At 12 weeks, I announced my pregnancy to the world, the outpouring of love and support from my friends was overwhelming and made me cry! Its lovely how a baby can bring so many friends together. I decided on my three, yes three, godmothers, Katie, Tasha and Rosie and was loving being pregnant and not having to hide it from anyone.
I told my employers and had rather mixed reviews. One was lovely, she asked me how I was feeling, how much I wanted to work and if the work load was ok and is still very supportive and lovely about my pregnancy. However, the other one found out through a colleague and promptly fired me for some lameo reason. Lovely guys!! Luckily, I hated that job too! Oh and I had two lovely weeks of morning sickness to enjoy!!
So, I rang my mum, tearful and feeling utterly rejected, as ever, mummy to the rescue. Her and Simon asked one of his colleagues to take me on to help them get new leads and do some admin. Thus, started my career in the electrical contractors trade! I think I'm doing really well, I'm motivated entirely but not letting down my parents when they've put their necks on line for me and James far too many times! My job role has changed in the last month and I mainly deal with marketing. I've been arranging a new health and safety certification for them, redesigning the website, ordering, invoicing and branding the vans so its pretty varied. I finally feel like I have a real job and I absolutely love it.
Happily, James also loves his new job and will be off to College to train to be an electrician in August. Over all, we are financially much better off, much happier and much closer as a couple.
I told my employers and had rather mixed reviews. One was lovely, she asked me how I was feeling, how much I wanted to work and if the work load was ok and is still very supportive and lovely about my pregnancy. However, the other one found out through a colleague and promptly fired me for some lameo reason. Lovely guys!! Luckily, I hated that job too! Oh and I had two lovely weeks of morning sickness to enjoy!!
So, I rang my mum, tearful and feeling utterly rejected, as ever, mummy to the rescue. Her and Simon asked one of his colleagues to take me on to help them get new leads and do some admin. Thus, started my career in the electrical contractors trade! I think I'm doing really well, I'm motivated entirely but not letting down my parents when they've put their necks on line for me and James far too many times! My job role has changed in the last month and I mainly deal with marketing. I've been arranging a new health and safety certification for them, redesigning the website, ordering, invoicing and branding the vans so its pretty varied. I finally feel like I have a real job and I absolutely love it.
Happily, James also loves his new job and will be off to College to train to be an electrician in August. Over all, we are financially much better off, much happier and much closer as a couple.
New Jobs and the First scan!
So, we both lost our jobs... What happened next? Did we both go on the dole? Well, a week passed, we applied for every job we could find and then Mum came home. I couldn't bear to tell her to her face as I knew that seeing any disappointment in her eyes would haunt me so, being the coward that I am, I emailed her. I can honestly say that her response was wonderful. She came straight over full of cuddles and Simon, my wonderful stepdad had already sorted out a Job for James as an electricians mate starting the following week providing he passed a test. They also promised to help us out with anything we needed and that we would never go without. So, feeling a bit more confident in myself (my ex-boss had pretty much outright rejected me when I asked to revoke my resignation which made me doubt my abilities as I had always thought I was a good worker, nevermind, was a shit job!) I went round to the Wine Bar I had worked at during the summer holidays when I was at University and asked for a job which I got!! Then mum popped into a lovely little bistro and I got a job there too! So there we were, three jobs between us :) sorted!
I met my wonderful midwife Lorna in the middle of week 8 and met a lovely lady who was 37 weeks pregnant after 5 years of trying and IVF which was wonderful.
So, at week 9 (they thought I was week 12 but scan showed otherwise) I went for my first scan with my mum, poor old James had to miss out as it was his first day back at work (he passed that test with 100%, I was so bloody proud!)
The next three weeks passed, didn't feel too bad, tired and very paranoid that something awful would happen and I counted down every second to the glorious 12 week mark which was also my 22nd Birthday, my 12 week scan was wonderful, it was the best birthday present I could ask for! Mum and James came along this time and I loved watching James see our baby for the first time.
I met my wonderful midwife Lorna in the middle of week 8 and met a lovely lady who was 37 weeks pregnant after 5 years of trying and IVF which was wonderful.
So, at week 9 (they thought I was week 12 but scan showed otherwise) I went for my first scan with my mum, poor old James had to miss out as it was his first day back at work (he passed that test with 100%, I was so bloody proud!)
The next three weeks passed, didn't feel too bad, tired and very paranoid that something awful would happen and I counted down every second to the glorious 12 week mark which was also my 22nd Birthday, my 12 week scan was wonderful, it was the best birthday present I could ask for! Mum and James came along this time and I loved watching James see our baby for the first time.
Finding Out
I found out I was going to be a mum at seven weeks. I had my implant removed in December and when I missed my first period I must have taken 100 pregnancy tests all of which were negative. Though I wasn't planning on getting pregnant as I'd only been with my boyfriend, James since October, with every negative, a deep feeling of disappointment set in. By the time my period was six weeks late, I had given up and booked a Doctors appointment to see what was wrong with me. She was a trainee GP and said it was just a side effect from my implant removal but asked me to take a test to make sure. She'd put the wrapper in the bin and had to fish it out to check the result. "Is this good news?" she said, "It's news!" came my shocked response. So I went home and told James who was shocked but delighted. Later that day, he lost his job and my new jobs (I'd resigned four days previously) fell through, leaving us pretty worried. To make matters worse, my mum went on holiday for a week so I couldn't tell her.
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